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Retribution is an Understatement

December 16, 2015 9 Comments

I find it amusing to note the Land Bruiser owner (ex car salesman’s) comments about a genuine Ford Ranger.

Ford Truths

Even the Hotel Owner prefers the Ford

1. Uni joint replaced 2 days ago was not replaced in Darwin. This is a joint that has driven 264,000km.

2. The Ford has only ever had one issue worthy of a mention and that was caused by me, the driver, running into a large mound of gravel on a road in China. This was repaired in Mongolia with a new part being installed and in Russia with a new set of shock rubbers and a wheel bearing, then a wheel alignment.

3. Any other issues with the Ford have been very minor unlike what the salesman has bullshitted about:

a. Rear shock rubbers replaced by me (maintenance only)
b. Electrical ignition switch repaired (maintenance only)
c. Had to re-screw a mud flat back on
d. Had to buy a new 2nd back up battery (maintenance only)
e. Been bogged twice

Maintenance for Cruiser

Mr Taylor attempts to play down the seriousness of Cruiser’s maintenance issues

On the other hand just look at what has gone wrong with the Land Bruiser. I just had an admission from the Salesman that the Ford is more comfortable to drive, more economical, more power and more storage and more facilities such as awning, tools, roof rack area to carry Bruiser spare parts.

1. Bruiser issues are:

a. 5 flat tyres
b. 2 x batteries had to be replaced
c. Tail gate worn pins
d. Front end shock rubbers
e. Fuel issue (had to use Ranger spare bolt to fix fuel pump)
f. Horn had to be fixed
g. Major bearing replacement at a cost of $600
h. Many many solar panel issues effecting running of fridge
i. Water tank leaked badly
j. Bruiser had to be towed out of a hopeless bog hole by Ford Ranger
k. Radiator had to be rebuilt
l. Muffler had to be re-anchored
m. Tail light had to be repaired
n. Electric windows faulty
o. Central locking has failed
p. Spare tyre came adrift whist driving along (took a builder to fix it with a stick)
q. Window tint removal at huge cost (ask about total cost in an email to the Taylors and see if you get these figures $12.00 AUS to install in Aust, $50 US c/- a fine in Kazakhstan for front side window tint, $300 US in Uzbekistan for rear side window tint removal talked down to $20 US (funded by the Ranger crew) only a car salesman could get a $300 fine down to $20 I guess it was the manner in which he spoke with the poor unsuspecting officer

The PMF Crew having fun

Even the Taylors want photos in front of the Ford Ranger

2. Now the big one:

The mighty Bruiser came within seconds of becoming a heap of ash. At the Sophia Hotel in Tashkent at about 9pm one evening the hotel manager came up to all 4 of us suggesting Alan should take a look at his car. Alan got to the door and saw smoke pouring from the Bruiser, he did a 180 on one toe and accelerated back towards Lynn, Donna and myself screaming “where’s my car keys?!” Lynn indicated in the room, he grabbed the keys almost ripping Lynn’s hand off, foot spun all the way to his room and within seconds we he was a blur running from his room to the front door. I yelled to Donna to move away from the door as there was a freight train coming through. At this point I was at the ready with hands on the bonnet. Al unlocked the smoke filled relic, he grabbed the fire extinguisher and pulled bonnet catch and prepared to spray under bonnet as I lifted gently not to allow too much oxygen in in the event of flames. This old pre-war vehicle was saved by a caring Ford owner and the Bruiser owner. Next day Al spent the whole day removing burnt wiring from the car and cleaning the smell of fire from the car. Very fortunate to have saved this old museum relic. It amazes me it is still running to this day.

Please do not judge all Bruisers by this one. I am sure they had built a decent model since the early 1900’s. Ford just keeps powering on with its supreme power delivered by its 3 litre common rail turbo diesel motor with comfort to suit a king along with all the luxuries of lift, including hair clippers, porta pottie, hot shower and under cover awning and twin gas cookers.

So as we can see the truth is now out. The Salesman (Al) has had his day. Oh by the way he did mention the Ford could not follow the Bruiser on our trek over the mountain on one stretch? This was due to so much wheel spin and disturbance of mud and crap on the track not even a tractor could have followed. This is not the first time, one other bogging set up by the Bruiser was in China, we go into a track after being environmentally destroyed by the landscape F%#%er.

Signaures on the Cruiser Door

Looking forward to adding more messages on our cars

Well now the record has been set straight here is some more interesting news.

We have now been through Azerbaijan and are in Georgia. What a great country this is. We have been to so many interesting sites, castles, cliff caves, and cute little villages. Once again the people are lovely.

Today we are taking a drive, probably in one car up into the mountains (in the rain) to view some caves recommended to us a lovely young girl back in a more recent town (I keep forgetting place) so this should be interesting.

In a couple of days’ time we will enter Turkey along the Black Sea at a place called (I forget) ask Lynn.

I personally am looking forward to Turkey as we have fond memories of this country from our visit in 2001. So much to see in particular along the southern coastal areas.

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Comments (9)

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  1. Alan says:

    Ahhh dear,
    It was an interesting read, embellished at quite a few key points. Now that we are near Europe, I am confident that the Ford will not need to be towed again. In fact, I told the Ford Tormentor the other day, that I felt the Ford was going to get to Portugal.
    I didn’t see on his blog where he mentioned rolling to a stop, twice within one hour, due to fuel choking. Poor old Ford, was asking its tormentor for a break. Not allowed!
    In good spirit, the Tormentor keeps the abuse flying, adding the lies as he pleases, we will just keep the tow straps ready and the tools in place ,ready to keep him moving!
    Al N Lynn

  2. Simen says:

    Haha, thanks for a good laugh!
    You know, with so many products of the best car, Im sure there is a bad apple or two…
    As to our Bruiser – we just took it up steep and muddy roads to a mountain, overlooking a beatiful village called Masouleh, west of Rasht in Iran.

    Just arrived in Tehran. Its been a beautiful ride.

    Again, it was amazing bumping into you guys in Gudauri, Ole and I are still talking about that wonderful evening we spent together, and the good talks we had. You were inspiring.

    All the best.

    Ole & Simen

  3. Green says:

    Hi dear Alan&Barry!This is Green,your tour guide in China.What I want to say is—do you still remember the first day when you entered China the moment when you got Chinese drivers’ licenses,what the smart policeman said? He said—never compete between Land Bruiser&Ford; Land Bruiser&Ford should be friends helping each other and peacefully on the roads following the other. So be friends,solve all the problems and be safe!I believe you will get to Portugal with two smile faces from Land Bruiser and Ford.

  4. Alan says:

    Did I mention at any time that the Ford is on its 8th tyre? Whereas the Cruiser is still on her original 4, plus old daggy spare?

    Did I mention at any time that, on the last day out of Georgia, 10kms before the Turkish border, the Ford was stopped, in the middle of a service station forecourt,with 100 litres (yes, 100 litres) of fuel dispersed around her,as her fuel tank was emptied by the service station staff! Not a good look, but I got a few photo’s, out of flame range of course.

  5. Vic Watts says:

    Merry Christmas to all four of you.
    Jenny and Vic

  6. Ken Johnson says:

    Merry Christmas to you all and Happy New Year.

  7. Elaine Wells says:

    Merry Christmas Donna, Barry, Lyn and Alan,

    Have a Great Christmas and all our love and Best Wishes for a Wonderful New Year filled with
    more fun and adventure as you travel the world.

    Love and Safe Travel,
    Elaine and Danny

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